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It's Been A While...

It’s hard to believe it’s been nearly four months since my last blog post. Summarizing the past few months in a short piece is no easy task, but I’ll do my best to catch you up. Hope In Every Spot I want to pick up where I left off last time. It was a few days after our first event and I was feeling overwhelmed with gratitude. The impact from that day has stayed with me ever since. In early June, we delivered our first batch of gifts to BC Children’s Hospital, and we’ve continued making regular deliveries since then. Our next drop is this Friday. Thanks to your generous donations, we should have enough for drops throughout the rest of this year. In addition to the regular drops, on July 16, we celebrated Sofia’s birthday by delivering 27 special gift baskets—one for each bed on the Oncology floor. Each basket contained a plush lion representing strength, a handmade crochet ladybug symbolizing hope, along with gift cards, activities, stickers, bookmarks, and toys. These were given to th...
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From Pain to Purpose

It was around 3 o’clock on Saturday—just a couple of hours into an event I’d been planning for nearly a year. The park was full—kids were running and laughing, parents were smiling and chatting, and the energy in the air felt perfect. Our rock painting table was a hit, and the Dream Party hero characters had just arrived, drawing even more excitement. Our first scheduled attraction, though, had just finished: face painting with Sam’s sister, Consuelo, and her daughter Raine. Consuelo and Raine went above and beyond. They brought joy, patience, and magic to every child who sat in their chairs. Not only did they do a phenomenal job, but they stayed longer than they had promised, making sure every little face that wanted to be transformed got their turn. I took a moment to thank Consuelo for everything, and as we embraced, I felt something I hadn’t felt in almost two years: a deep, powerful sense of relief. Relief is not something you feel while your child is battling cancer. Even on the ...

Arizona / One Year

Usually, when I sit down to write one of these, I have a clear sense of purpose — a theme that's been sitting with me, something I need to get out. Writing is often the final release that lets me move forward. But this time is different. There’s no single thread tying it all together. Just a lot on my mind, and maybe I’m hoping that getting the words out will help me move through it. Hope In Every Spot I want to start with an update on our “ Hope In Every Spot ” event. We’re six weeks out, and honestly, we're feeling really good about where things stand — especially considering this is our first time fundraising in Sofia’s honor. If you read my last blog or follow me on Instagram, you already know the heart behind this: we're raising money and collecting donations to give thousands of dollars worth of toys, activities, and gift cards to children and families battling cancer at BC Children’s Hospital — just like Sofia once did. Since announcing the event, we’ve had an Amazon...

Hope in Every Spot

Even in the earliest days of Sofia being sick, it was clear to me that I needed to do more with my own time on earth.  As I spent more days at Children's Hospital, that feeling only grew stronger. I saw incredible people selflessly volunteering their time for kids and families they had never met, and I knew I wanted to do the same. A pet therapy program where people volunteer their time to bring their dogs to the hospital to provide some much needed comfort to kids (and their parents) Therapy clowns named Fizzie and Cosmo would visit a couple days a week. They could make Sofia laugh like no one else The Child Life volunteers, often teenagers and young adults, volunteered their time to play with the kids in hospital or their siblings. Carter must have done at least 100 scavenger hunts with these incredible people Smoothie Sundays where volunteers from West Coast Kids Cancer Foundation would whip up super tasty smoothies in the T8 kitchen for patients, family members and staff I...

Our Retreat to Mazatlan, Challenges and Finding Purpose

It's taken me so long to write this. In fact, it's been over two months since I last wrote anything. Writing has always been therapeutic for me, and I certainly have a lot to say. However, I've come to realize that writing about what's on my mind is often the final step in my process of moving forward. I can't seem to put my thoughts into words until I'm relatively certain I'm ready to release whatever has been lingering in my mind. While my time away with Samantha and Carter brought us so much good, it also challenged me in unexpected ways. Recently, I’ve struggled to find my way out of a valley of grief and depression, which explains the long delay in writing. Even though I still have work to do, I feel like I’m starting to show signs of improvement. I'm hopeful that putting some of this into words will help push me further toward optimism and healing. Samantha, Carter, and I left for Mexico on November 5th and returned to Canada on January 18th—75 day...

Life happens fast

For those who know Sam and me well, it will come as no surprise that Sam took a ton more photos and videos than I did—especially videos! For whatever reason, I’ve never been one to capture videos, and I rarely watch back the few that I have taken. I’m more the type to enjoy a school play in the moment rather than view it through my phone’s camera. But boy, am I grateful Sam had a different approach. She took thousands of photos and videos of Carter and Sofia. Many of those are now the most precious gifts I have—memories I can replay forever. One of the first things I did after Sofia passed away was go through all of Sam's photos from 2020-2024 and pull out my favorite ones of Sofia. Sam, like most people, backs up her photos to iCloud, but I needed to have these special photos saved in more than one place. It would take me weeks to go through over 10,000 photos. I selected many of them for the slideshow we played at Sofia’s Celebration of Life. The task of sorting through that many...

Signs from Sofia

Since Sofia passed away, I’ve been exposed to an abundance of people who are grieving the loss of their loved ones. Either directly, through stories I’ve heard or things I’ve read. I’ve also been quite active trying to work on my own grief too. I’ve interacted with a grief counsellor, I’ve read books, listened to podcasts, watched videos and, very recently, joined a group session organized by Canuck Place. One of the most common behaviours I’ve observed among grieving individuals is their deliberate avoidance of visual reminders of their loss, which could potentially trigger emotional distress. For some, that might look like removing pictures in their house. For others, it might be avoiding places or people where memories are their most intense. It’s rational behaviour if you ask me. Even if you’re not grieving a loved one, everyone likely has a tendency to find ways to avoid things that might cause pain. Yet, for whatever reason, it hasn’t been my path. Instead, I’ve found myself putt...